Archive for November, 2009

When facing the difficult task of healing relationship wounds, it’s necessary to understand you will need to invest quite a bit of time and effort. It is possible to mend a relationship, but it won’t necessarily be quick and easy, and you won’t be able to do it all on your own.

There are several steps you’ll need to take to repair your broken relationship. A lot of what you will have to do will depend on what caused the relationship to break down in the first place. In most cases, the breakdown hasn’t been caused by only one or two things, and it may be that an accumulation of smaller issues eventually tore your relationship apart.

Finding the cause of the break down is the first thing you will need to do in order to come up with a ‘game plan’ to fix it. You wouldn’t expect your mechanic to fix your car without first knowing what was wrong with it, and the same principle applies to your relationship.

Not only will you need to figure out what went wrong, you will need to be honest with yourself and try to figure out what part you played in it. That can be quite difficult, but very worthwhile.

No one wants to admit they’ve been wrong or made mistakes, but you need to really look inside yourself and determine if your actions may have contributed to the problem. Also look at how you may have reacted to your ex verbally. Words can be extremely hurtful, and when that happens, it can take a long time for the hurt to heal.

Once you’ve figured out the mistakes you may have made, it’s up to you to determine if you’re willing to invest the time needed to fix them. If you can’t make a 100% commitment to changing your behavior than you might as well end the relationship right now. There’s no point in dragging you and your partner through further pain.

But before you do anything, think about whether or not your partner would be willing to work on the relationship too. No matter how sincere or motivated you are, it needs both of you working together to get things back to a good place. You can’t do it alone, and neither can your partner. If you aren’t both 100% committed to making it work, it’s time to move on.

If you both believe your relationship is truly worth saving, you can fix the relationship and even make it better than it was before. It will take some time…and lot’s of love.

For more tips like these, check out this guide to repairing your relationship.

You’ve been separated for a few weeks now and suddenly you wake up one morning with the thought “I want my ex back!”

This is a pretty normal reaction if you feel you’re still in love with your ex. It’s also natural that you probably have no real idea of how to go about getting your ex back. So you look around for help so you don’t make a complete mess of your attempt to win them back. And that’s a great move.

Before you try to get your ex back, make sure that you’re not still going through the grieving process that comes at the end of a relationship.

It probably sounds strange, but at the end of most relationships, there is a period when the pain is so intense, and although you may not have thought about it, this is grieving – for your lost relationship. During this process it is very natural to want your ex back, and for that feeling to be all consuming.

Before jumping into the deep end trying to get back with your ex, this would be a good time to try and analyse what went wrong with your relationship.

Unless you take the time to go over the mistakes that you might have made, getting back with your ex will only eventually lead to the same break down in the relationship as before. And that won’t do either of you any good.

Don’t focus on what you believe your ex might have done wrong, but concentrate on your mistakes. Let your ex take care of their stuff for now and you take care of yours. Down the track you can work together on issues, but for now, worry about your own issues and mistakes.

If you’re sincere about getting your ex back, then it’s crucial that you get advice. Here’s a book that comes highly recommended, and will help you in your quest to get your ex back.